Three of my favorite words in the English language. German Chocolate Cake, Banana Cream Pie (or Pudding), Cheesecake of any variety, not many desserts I don’t like. My friend Stephanie makes a Chocolate Lasagna. Just listening to her recite the recipe makes me hungry.
While writing my new book, “Love Remains,” on Faith, Hope, and Love has me thinking. Last week, I began the section on hope after much prayer and supplication. Placing faith in Jesus means we have hope for a better tomorrow. We no longer need to fear death because Christ overcame it, rising from the grave on day three. Which means the best is yet to come.
Our best day on earth can’t compare to one day in heaven. No more pain, no more tears, just Jesus and His all-encompassing, unconditional love.
But I don’t like the phrase, “the best is yet to come,” for a couple of reasons. First, the words get overused. And the phrase doesn’t give vision. Most people learn visually; the ability to picture the outcome in your mind allows you to have hope. Just like sitting down to dinner, knowing dessert’s coming.
Vanilla ice cream, dripping with hot fudge, sitting on top of a chocolate brownie, whipped cream, with a cherry on top, that you can see. Whatever precious dessert you love most, cherishing every bite, eyes clothes, mouth smiling, nostrils filled with the scent of deliciousness, can’t compare to heaven.
Nothing can we know on earth. Moments of bliss in this life, don’t compare to the marvel of the next. Our human minds can’t possibly understand the true nature of heaven.
But we can understand that dessert comes at the end of the meal. And we know, whatever awaits us, can’t compare to the first course. God saves the best for last.
In college, on a bike ride, I apparently had an erratic pace, according to the track star riding with me. Sometimes I cruised; other times, I stood, peddling with all my heart to climb a hill, then enjoying the swish of the wheels rolling down the other side. Pace didn’t exist in my world, all in or all out, no middle.
My friends tried to teach me rhythm when I tried out for cheerleading. I still remember standing in one of the seasoned cheerleader’s living room, her fingers snapping, setting the beat, and my two left feet trying to follow along. Miraculously, I did make the squad. But only by the grace of God.
Teams picture, of course, the reporter misspelled my name, “Minich” instead of “Minick,” a common frustration in my teenage years.Leaving for CampAlways a base, my athletic build made a sturdy foundation.
“We need to find a rhythm.”
Fast forward thirty years to Ron still trying to teach me rhythm. As a music major, Ron knows pace and rhythm well. Unlike me, who only has two speeds, fast and faster.
“My main prayer for you is that you don’t hurt yourself.” Thanks, Honey!
Working for Manhattan-based Nautica International taught me a fast-paced lifestyle, the job’s demands creating the rhythm. After sixteen years with the company working long days, sleeping short nights, and driving or flying countless miles, I still didn’t understand my friend’s question from our bicycle ride, much less rhythm.
But Ron did, and after a particularly hectic period of back-to-back travel, Ron needed us to find a rhythm. My husband didn’t like the New York minute; he prefers the slower pace of an acoustic guitar.
And so we began to work rhythm into our lives, one negotiation after another. Kicking and screaming, I began to understand both pace and rhythm. However, I didn’t enjoy it, nor did the rhythm feel natural.
But now, as I develop my coaching skills and understand relaxed concentration in sports, I’m learning how rhythm keeps you in the moment. Discover the movement, and you will find the rhythm.
“Bounce. Hit.”
Following the movement in tennis requires keeping your eye on the ball. Forcing yourself either audibly or mentally to say “Bounce. Hit.” will tune your senses into the rhythm of the point. With tennis, you must call your shots and the opponents. Doing so keeps you engaged in the movement of the point and helps you find the rhythm.
“Back. Hit.”
In golf, the ball doesn’t move, but the club does. Following the movement in golf means becoming aware of the club head while focusing your eyes on the ball. When the club reaches the pinnacle of the backswing, “Back,” and at the point of contact, “Hit.” Golf has a slower rhythm than tennis; in a four-hour, 18-hole round, you only spend three minutes hitting the ball. Keeping your mind focused, not allowing emotions or cognitive thought to interfere with your mental game, requires relaxed concentration, “Back. Hit.”
Working on these mental exercises in my two favorite sports helped me identify rhythm in games and life.
“Trust the training. Control the mind. Be nice.” My new motto for life and faith.
After finishing a rigorous two-hour doubles match, I began to “see” rhythm. Practicing my new motto, focusing on “Bounce. Hit,” while trusting my training and maintaining a friendly demeanor with my fellow players invigorated me. For the first time, I began to understand the phrase “Playing out of my mind.”
And finally, I’m beginning to understand rhythm.
Trust. Follow.
Faith, for me, means following Jesus. Falling into step with Jesus requires seeking Him through study, conversation, connection, and community. Pursuing Christ will show you His movement. Each day requires new steps of faith. “Trust. Follow.” Step. Step. One step at a time, Jesus leads us home.
“Then, one day, you’ll turn the corner,” Lynda said.
Sitting with my mentor on the hot surface beside our favorite tennis court, gazing heavenward, Lynda taught me. Frustrated that she always beat me, no matter how much I practiced and learned, Lynda responded with love and grace. Understanding my tender heart and the impossible standards I set for myself, she knew how to encourage me.
Learning something new takes time. But with practice and persistence, one day, everything will fall into place, and you will arrive at a level you thought you would never achieve. Practice plus persistence equals payoff.
As the years passed, the more I played tennis, the more I understood Lynda’s words. When learning something new, keep pushing forward. Eventually, it does pay off. But it’s so hard not to fall back into bad habits.
Like the Israelites in the desert, the minute Moses turned his back, they started worshipping other gods. So us!
Lynda’s words meant life’s a process. Nothing happens overnight. Everything takes time, especially when learning something new. But it’s worth it.
“Do it right the first time; you don’t have to do it again.”
Dad’s voice rings in my head alongside Lynda’s; from them, I’ve learned habits matter. Take the time to build the proper habits. Wait for the ah-ha moment because it will come. You just don’t know when. Keep at it, keep trying, keep doing.
Today, I had a coaching ah-ha moment.
Lately, I’ve been thinking about who I am as a coach. As I understand that I control my thoughts and actions, I ask myself who I want to become?
Instantly, my heart answers, the woman God created me to become.
Becoming a better coach helps me become her.
I’ve begun doing two things in my off-time from coaching, playing tennis, and learning golf. Playing reminds me of the pressures players face during a match. Taking private lessons, something I’ve never done before teaches me what students feel like when they come to me.
After finishing my second private lesson, I realized the difference between learning and teaching, giving me a new perspective as a coach. My obsession with becoming a great coach made me forget the student’s perspective, the most important part of the equation.
An ah-ha moment!
To communicate with someone well, you must understand their perspective. With children, you get down on their level and look at them eye to eye. With coaches, you can learn a new sport and take some lessons. Students can’t come to my level; I must go to theirs.
As with coaching, you must go to their level to bring them to yours.
And so it is with Christ; He came to us because we can’t go to Him.
Changing perspective changed my philosophy. Looking at both sides of the spectrum helps you find balance in the middle. Widening our view allows us to observe more. The more we see, the more we know. Wisdom comes with vision.
Life still so much to learn. Corners, so many yet to turn. May I not miss any!
